Comic’s PAC Is More Than a Gag (New York Times)

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By DAVID CARR

Published: August 21, 2011

Let’s start with a spot political quiz. Which of the following are legitimate political action committees known as Super PACs, and which is fake? 


A) Citizens for a Working America

B) Make Us Great Again

C) Citizens for a Better Tomorrow, Tomorrow

D) We Love USA

If you guessed that C was the fake, you’d be wrong. It was a trick question: these are all legitimate Super PACs. “Citizens for a Better Tomorrow, Tomorrow” was created by the comedian Stephen Colbert, which makes it funnier.

But not by much. Citizens for a Better Tomorrow, Tomorrow may be a running gag on “The Colbert Report” on Comedy Central, but it is spending money as it sees fit, with little in the way of disclosure, just like its noncomedic brethren.

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In Major Gaffe, Bachmann Confuses Ass, Hole in Ground (Borowitz Report)

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ARIZONA (The Borowitz Report) – In a fledgling campaign that has already produced more than its share of gaffes, Rep. Michele Bachmann (R-Minn) today confused her ass with a hole in the ground during a campaign swing through Arizona.

Speaking to a group of supporters in Phoenix, Rep. Bachmann raised eyebrows when she said, “It’s great to be here in Arizona, the home of my ass.”

After her comment was greeted with confused murmurs from the crowd, Rep. Bachmann quickly added, “Oh wait, did I say my ass?  I meant the Grand Canyon.”

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Glenn Beck To Rick Santorum: ‘I Could Kiss You In The Mouth’ (Gawker)

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By Seth Abramovitch 

What should have been just another interminable conversation between two mind-boggling A-holes took an intriguing turn down Rainbow Alley last night, when Fox News host (and self-loathing Gleek) Glenn Beck accidentally blurted out, "I could kiss you in the mouth" to Rick Santorum on Thursday's show. (It was in response to Santorum saying that he'd signed the "Cut, Cap and Balance" pledge, which is apparently the fiscal conservative equivalent of announcing, "I just scored a pair of Lady Gaga floor seats!")

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Republicans Propose Replacing Social Security with Groupons (Borowitz Report)

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WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report) – Presenting what he called a revolutionary plan to slash the nation’s mountain of debt, Rep. Paul Ryan (R-WI) today proposed eliminating the Social Security program in its entirety and replacing it with Groupons.

“Instead of waiting each month for a check from Social Security, America’s elderly will receive valuable Groupons for everything they need, from Ramen noodles to cat food to caskets,” Mr. Ryan said in an appearance on Fox News.

Adding that Groupons would also help provide for elders’ medical needs, the congressman illustrated his point by holding up a Groupon offering 30 percent off on open-heart surgery in Cincinnati.

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Florda Gov. Rick Scott's budget scene scripted down to who could attend (St. Petersbug Times)

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By Aaron Sharockman
Times Staff Writer
Friday, May 27, 2011

THE VILLAGES — Each detail of Florida Gov. Rick Scott's first budget signing was painstakingly considered.

From the location ­— a conservative retirement community in Central Florida — to the mini-red "veto" Sharpie pens Scott handed out as keepsakes.

From the music that would announce Scott's arrival to the stage, to, it turns out, who could be there.

At the urging of Scott officials, Sumter County sheriff's deputies escorted a group of more than a dozen Democrats — mainly retirees who live in The Villages — from Thursday's event at the town square.

The reason?

The $69 billion state budget signing ceremony was a "private event."

Staffers and Republican operatives searched the crowd of about 200 looking for people holding anti-Scott signs. They were noted and asked to leave. Those with pro-Scott signs were allowed to stay.

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The job-killing governor (St. Petersburg Times Editorial)

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Gov. Rick Scott will sign into law today a $69.7 billion state budget for 2011-12 that he boasts is all about creating jobs and reducing Florida's high unemployment. In fact, it is a job-killing budget that threatens the state's anemic recovery and makes the state less attractive to new residents and businesses. The governor and the Legislature are starving the state instead of investing in it. Let us count the ways they are undermining Florida's economy:

1 State workers Positions in prisons, social services and other areas have been slashed. Scott says he's only interested in private sector jobs. State employees buy houses, cars and appliances, too — even if they have not had raises in five years. Estimated Jobs lost: 4,500.

2 Public schools Spending will drop by $542 per student, or 8 percent. School districts are sending out lay-off notices to thousands of teachers, including 1,400 in Broward and 1,100 in Pinellas. Some of those could keep their jobs. But Pasco schools could eliminate 470 overall positions and Pinellas could cut 400 positions. School districts are the largest employers in many counties. Estimated jobs lost: THOUSANDS.

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Newt Gingrich’s Wife Dropped Between a Quarter and a Half Million Dollars at Tiffany & Co. (New York Magazine)

Image by Getty Images via @daylifeEmail • Twitter • Facebook • LinkedIn • YouTube

5/17/11

Politico and the rest of the mini-scoop-driven Internet is currently freaking out because, at one point, Callista Gingrich, wife of Newt, reported between $250,000 and $500,000 in a "revolving charge account" owed to the high-end jeweler Tiffany & Co. (In financial disclosure forms, "revolving charge accounts" are basically "credit cards.") The debt was reported in 2007 when she filed forms covering 2005 and 2006 as part of her job at the House Agriculture Committee, and she listed it as her husband's responsibility. Since she shortly thereafter dropped out of public service, and Newt hasn't been in Congress since 1999, we don't know whether the debt has been paid off. (They're a relatively wealthy family that presumably employs financial advisers, or at least listens to Suze Orman, so it's not too much of a leap to guess it has been.) The last time they reported their net worth, back around the same time, it was between $1 and $2.5 million. So, basically, at some point, it looks like they spent ten percent of their net worth on jewels.

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Rick Scott for president? It's possible (St. Petersburg Times)

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By Adam C. Smith
Times Political Editor
May 13, 2011

Rick Scott for president in 2012?

Absurd as it sounds, people who have talked to Florida's tea party governor about the Republican presidential field are convinced Scott has a bid lurking in the back of his mind.

"I'm not running for president,'' Scott declared the other day.

Probably he won't.

But let's say the field of Republican candidates still looks muddled and uninspiring come November. Let's say no one has managed to persuade Jeb Bush or New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie to get in the race. Let's say fed-up tea party activists still dominate the GOP primary electorate and show no enthusiasm for the "electable" Mitt Romneys, Tim Pawlentys and Jon Huntsmans of the world.

Enter Rick Scott, fresh off a year of slashing spending and regulation in Florida, and of infuriating moderate Republicans, independents, Democrats and newspaper editorial writers. By then a proven, uncompromising antigovernment crusader, he may be the best sell among Republican primary voters in these turbulent times.

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George W. Bush Describes Getting Call From Obama About Osama Bin Laden Death (Mediaite)

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by Colby Hall
May 13th, 2011

Ever since Barack Obama announced the capture and killing of Osama bin Laden, many in the media have sought commentary from former President George W. Bush. ABC News is reporting that, during an appearance Wednesday at a conference of hedge fund managers in Las Vegas, the Bush made his first candid public comments on the killing of bin Laden saying “The guy is dead. That is good.”

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Poll Reveals Poorer And Less Educated Voters Support Sarah Palin, Wealthier Voters Prefer Romney (Mediaite)

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by Alex Alvarez
May 9th, 2011

A new Gallup poll reveals that voters who identify as more conservative, do not have college degrees and who make less than $24,000 annually are more likely to support former Alaska governor Sarah Palin over Mitt Romney for president in 2012. Romney, on the other hand, has evidently fared better with voters who describe themselves as “liberals to moderate”, have received degrees of higher learning and who make at least $90,000 a year.

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Trump Undecided About What Stupid Shit to Say Next (Borowitz Report)

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by Andy Borowitz
May 2, 2011

NEW YORK (The Borowitz Report) – With the public’s attention focused on the death of Osama bin Laden, billionaire Donald Trump huddled with advisors for the second straight day to try to decide what stupid shit to say next.

“The bin Laden thing has definitely stolen the headlines from Donald,” said close associate and advisor Tracy Klugian.  “The only way he can grab them back is by doing what he does best: saying something really fucked up.”

Trump’s two-day hiatus from spewing messed up shit is the longest on record, experts say, adding to the pressure on the billionaire to break his silence with something truly craptastic.

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Green Day’s Billie Joe Armstrong: Palin, Huckabee ‘Rotten To The Core,’ Democrats Are ‘Fu*king P***ies’ (Mediaite)

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by Mark Joyella
April 18th, 2011

In an interview with Details magazine, Green Day frontman Billie Joe Armstrong offers his thoughts on today’s political climate, saying “the Democrats are a bunch of f**king pussies. It was so smart for the Republicans to embrace the Tea Party: ‘We don’t believe everything you say, but we’ll listen to you.’ I get more confused every day.”

He also takes on Sarah Palin and Mike Huckabee:

On Sarah Palin: “I listen to the shit that comes out of her mouth, and I’m just in awe. These are Sunday-school teachers becoming politicians. Mike Huckabee? He’s the guy that diddled you while holding the Bible. He’s so soft-spoken, so Mr. Rogers. Palin is the same—it’s this sneaky way to make Americans feel comfortable, but you know they’re rotten to the core.”

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The New York Observer’s Trump Problem (Gawker.com)

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By John Cook

Pouty fathead Donald Trump is a tailor-made character for the New York Observer, which purports to monitor Manhattan's smug oligarchy with a gimlet-eyed detachment. And his semi-coherent presidential grumblings, which count as news just about everywhere else, make ideal grist for the Observer's mill. Too bad he's the owner's father-in-law.


Here's a sentence that someone ought to write about Trump: "The Donald's incredible bullshit machine keeps churning up the landscape, spewing forth a plume of chutzpah that might have made even P.T. Barnum a bit queasy."

Actually, that was written about Trump, and published in the Observer, 13 years ago.

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Donald Trump: ‘I’ve Always Had a Great Relationship With The Blacks’ (Mediaite)

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by Colby Hall
April 14th, 2011

Donald Trump recently granted an interview with NY Post editor Fred Dicker in which he most notably denied reports that he’d be announcing his presidential plans during the season finale of his reality show Celebrity Apprentice. But perhaps the other noteworthy bon mot to come from the lengthy and candid interview was Trump’s assertion that he’s always enjoyed a great relationship with “the blacks.” Efforts to confirm Trump’s statement were fruitless as we could not find one individual who could speak on behalf of “the blacks.”

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“Best Wishes, Donald Trump”: A Future President’s Letter to Vanity Fair (Vanity Fair)

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by Juli Weiner

April 11, 2011 

 

It was with great delight and a sense of kinship that we at Vanity Fair read Donald Trump’s letter to the editor of The New York Times. Writing in response to Gail Collins’s April 2 column, “Donald Trump Gets Weirder,” the petty casino fauxgul and insincere 2012 presidential contender took a few grammatically daring swipes at the columnist (“Her storytelling ability and word usage [coming from me, who has written many best-sellers] is not at a very high level”) and repeated his latest cri de coeur, Birtherism.

We, too, are recent beneficiaries of Trump’s editorial suggestions. On March 24, Vanity Fair editor Graydon Carter received a packet of documents from Trump containing a print-out of a VF Daily blog post from the week prior (shown below), several articles from blogs and newspapers concerning the ratings of Celebrity Apprentice and Trump’s presidential aspirations, and a debossed “DONALD J. TRUMP” note card of surprisingly thin paper stock.

Click HERE to Read Trump's Letter and More!
 

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Sarah Palin On Trump’s Birth Certificate Investigation: ‘More Power To Him!’ (Mediaite)

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by Sarah Devlin
April 9th, 2011

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Obama Conspiracist Needs Photoshop Lesson (Newser)

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By John Johnson
Newser Staff
Apr 7, 2011

(Newser) – An author on a mission to prove President Obama is a fraud asserts that a widely circulated photo of Barack Obama with his grandparents is a fake. In his YouTube video, Jack Cashill explains that Obama has been Photoshopped to appear between his grandparents, and he offers up what he says is the "original" Obama-less photo as proof. Trouble is, as Media Matters delights in pointing out, you can still see Obama's knee between them. (The rest of his body has magically disappeared, though.)

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Christine O’Donnell Was Once Inside a Building at Oxford University (New York Magazine)

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Christine O'Donnell is being accused of more lying, this time about her claim to have taken a course at England's esteemed Oxford University, which you probably could have guessed was false.

O'Donnell's LinkedIn bio page lists "University of Oxford" as one of the schools she attended, claiming she studied "Post Modernism in the New Millennium." But it turns out that was just a course conducted by an institution known as the Phoenix Institute, which merely rented space at Oxford ....

"It wasn't an official course of Oxford University," [the program's overseer Chris] Fletcher said. "It wasn't sponsored by Oxford University. We rented the space."

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Another School Says Christine O’Donnell Did Not Attend (Mediaite)

by Talking Points Memo
September 29th, 2010

Claremont Graduate University tells TPM that Senate candidate Christine O’Donnell did not attend the Southern California school despite listing it under education on her LinkedIn profile.


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