David Letterman: Top Ten Messages On Sarah Palin's Answering Machine

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Top Ten

"Hi, It's George W. Bush. Why didn't anyone tell me resigning was an option?" "It's John McCain -- why did I call?" "Mark Sanford here. Ever been to Argentina?" "I'm calling from Geico to see if you want to renew your dogsled insurance" "It's Letterman -- we still cool?" "McCain again. Still no idea why I called" "Hi, it's the dry cleaner. Having trouble getting caribou blood out of your Prada jacket" "Hi, it's Sarah...oops...dialed my own number" "Schwarzenegger here. If you want a job, California could use a new governor" "Hey, it's McCain. Who would've thought you'd retire before I did?"

The Uncle Sam Interviews: Carole King (Funny or Die)

The Uncle Sam Interviews: Carole King from Carole King

Sarah 'Barracuda' Palin and the Piranhas of the Press (PoliticsDaily.com)

By Carl Cannon
July 8, 2009

Sarah Palin's rambling abdication speech was hard to follow, let alone acclaim, but in her abrupt announcement that she is withdrawing from public office, the Republican governor of Alaska was hardly the only player in a 10-month drama who demonstrated a lack of self-awareness. Democrats scoffed at her "politics of personal destruction" line, but it's a maxim they originally popularized, and one they will undoubtedly trot out again the next time it happens to one of their own. But the true villains in this political morality play may have been the press.

The mainstream media is undergoing its demise, drip by drip, day by day, and its practitioners, which include most of my friends in life, are under considerable pressure. In my opinion, however, these pressures do not excuse the treatment accorded Sarah Palin. On the contrary, to me the entire Sarah saga revealed that it wasn't only the traditional media's business model that is broken. Our journalism model is busted, too.

In the 2008 election, we took sides, straight and simple, particularly with regard to the vice presidential race. I don't know that we played a decisive role in that campaign, and I'm not saying the better side lost. What I am saying is that we simply didn't hold Joe Biden to the same standard as Sarah Palin, and for me, the real loser in this sordid tale is my chosen profession.

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Billions in aid go to areas that backed Obama in '08 (USA Today)

By Brad Heath
USA TODAY
July 8, 2009

WASHINGTON — Billions of dollars in federal aid delivered directly to the local level to help revive the economy have gone overwhelmingly to places that supported President Obama in last year's presidential election.

That aid — about $17 billion — is the first piece of the administration's massive stimulus package that can be tracked locally. Much of it has followed a well-worn path to places that regularly collect a bigger share of federal grants and contracts, guided by formulas that have been in place for decades and leave little room for manipulation.

STIMULUS FUNDS: States aren't using money as intended

"There's no politics at work when it comes to spending for the recovery," White House spokesman Robert Gibbs says.

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Satirist John Breneman Delves Deep into Cyberspace (BlogTalkRadio)

What’s in store for Alaska Governor Sarah Palin after she resigns her seat on July 26?

“She plans to take a brief vacation, shooting media jackals from an airplane.

John: He reports, he derides.

“Then she may hit the paid-speaker circuit with her inane ability to spout random strings of words that underscore her refreshing lack of knowledge and experience.”

The according to “Fox News anchor puppet Deuce Murdoch,” the latest incarnation of BlogTalkRadio’s resident humorist John Breneman.

The Boston Herald blogger, who, as primary alter ego Reid Page, anchor of the 13 O’Clock News, contributes weekly reports to BTR’s Game On!, recently launched a stand-alone Humor Gazette report here on the network.

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Sarah Palin Is a Hit for Vanity Fair. But She’s No Jessica Simpson–Or Miley Cyrus! (D)

by Peter Kafka
Posted on July 6, 2009 at 1:05 PM PT

The punditocracy is still trying to figure out why Sarah Palin is bailing on her day job. But over at Condé Nast’s Vanity Fair, they’ve got better things to do–like tallying page views for Todd Purdum’s buzzy feature story on the soon-to-be former governor of Alaska.

The story went up on VF.com six days ago and has generated just under two million page views since then, says executive online editor Michael Hogan. (Disclosure: I’ve been a free-lance contributor to Vanity Fair’s “New Establishment” list in the past and will be again this year). Had Palin not made her blockbuster announcement on the Friday before the Fourth of July, the piece would be doing even better: Vanity Fair generated more traffic on the Tuesday the story was posted than the day after Palin made her news.

Still, it’s a big coup for the magazine’s site. The only way to generate more attention would be to run a slideshow featuring young attractive women.

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Sarah Palin on her resignation: 'Politically speaking, if I die, I die. So be it' (AP)

THE ASSOCIATED PRESS

Tuesday, July 7th 2009, 8:04 AM

ANCHORAGE, Alaska — Sarah Palin says she's not a quitter, she's a fighter, but adds that, politically speaking, "if I die, I die. So be it."

The Alaska governor spoke in taped interviews on ABC, NBC and CNN broadcast Tuesday morning.

She told CNN that "all options are on the table" for her future.

But told ABC's "Good Morning America" that she recognizes she might not have political staying power after her surprise resignation Friday, which came just as she had been expected to elevate her national profile ahead of a possible 2012 Republican presidential run.

"I said before ... 'You know, politically speaking, if I die, I die. So be it,'" she said.

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Send Carlos Pena to the 2009 All-Star Game!